WHAT’S HAPPENING TO CHILD-REARING FAMILIES?

Scholars are now widely in agreement that the best family situation for children and adolescents is to live with married parents who have a good marriage.  Unfortunately, the percentage of child rearing families with these characteristics has dropped dramatically in recent decades. In the 1973-1976 period, 51% of children under the age of eighteen were living with married adults in a marriage the reporting spouse rated as “very happy.” By the 1997-2002 period, that percentage had dropped to 37%.^(a)  This negative change is the result of two trends:  fewer children living in families headed by married couples, and a drop over time in the marital happiness of those couples (See Figures 11 and 4 in this report.)

Several reasons for this deterioration in children’s family situation are especially worrisome. One is that Americans increasingly view marriage and child rearing as separate pursuits. Take, for example, agreement among never-married young people ages 18-34 with the statement “those who want children should get married.” In national surveys, 64% of the males in this category agreed in 1988, but only 51% did so in 2002. For females the drop was slightly steeper, from 56% to 42%.^(b) Moreover, in our annual reporting of the family life opinions of American high school seniors, the greatest increase has been in regard to the statement “having a child without being married is experimenting with a worthwhile lifestyle and not affecting anyone else.”  Fifty-six percent of senior boys now agree with this statement, up from 49% in the late 1990s and currently dead even with the percentage of senior girls who agree. (See Figure 17.)

A second reason for children’s deteriorating family situation is that children seem to be a growing impediment for the happiness of marriages.  Many studies have shown that the arrival of the first baby commonly has the effect of pushing the mother and father apart, bringing stress to the marriage. ^(c)  One recent review of over 100 research studies found that parents report significantly lower marital satisfaction than nonparents.  This is especially true for parents of infants: Only 38% of mothers of infants have high marital satisfaction, compared to 62% of childless women. Further, this review concluded that the effect of parenthood on marital happiness is more negative among younger birth cohorts and higher socioeconomic groups, signs that the negative effect may be on the increase. ^(d)

a Calculation by Professor Norval Glenn, University of Texas, using data from the General Social Surveys conducted by the National Opinion Research Center, University of Chicago.  Data are weighted by number of persons under age 18 in the household. The trends in pre-adults living with an unmarried person and in those living with married persons in a “very happy” marriage are statistically significant (p<.01 on a one-tailed test).

b General Social Surveys

c Carolyn Pape Cowan and Philip A. Cowan, When Partners Become Parents: The Big Life Change for Couples (New York: Basic Books, 1992); Jay Belsky and John Kelly, The Transition to Parenthood (New York: Dell, 1994).

d  Jean M Twenge, W. Keith Campbell and Craig A. Foster, “Parenthood and Marital Satisfaction: A Meta-Analytic Review,” Journal of Marriage and the Family 65 (August 2003): 574-583